Reasons Dogs Don't Use Computers
Reasons dogs don't use computers
* Can't stick their heads out of Windows '98.
* Fetch command not available on all platforms.
* Hard to read the monitor with your head cocked to one side.
* Too difficult to "mark" every website they visit.
* Can't help attacking the screen when they hear "You've Got Mail."
* Fire hydrant icon simply frustrating.
* Involuntary tail wagging is dead giveaway they're browsing www.chazhound.com instead of working.
* Keep bruising noses trying to catch that MPEG frisbee.
* Not at all fooled by Chuckwagon Screen Saver.
* Still trying to come up with an "emoticon" that signifies tail-wagging.
* Waiting for the introduction of the Microsoft Opposable Thumb.
* Three words: Carpal Paw Syndrome
* 'Cause dogs ain't GEEKS! Now, cats, on the other hand...
* Barking in next cube keeps activating YOUR voice recognition software.
* Saliva-coated mouse gets mighty difficult to manuever.
* Annoyed by lack of newsgroup, alt.pictures.master's.leg.
* Butt-sniffing more direct and less deceiving than online chat rooms.
* TpO HAqRD TO TgYPE WITyH PAzWS.