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  #11  
Old 10-16-2013, 01:16 AM
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Linds post was amazing.

I have to admit. I let hearsay get to me or rude emails from crappy people. It makes me second guess my decisions.

I've always had 3 dogs for the most part. I've never felt they got slighted or suffered cause I added a new dog. 3 is my number. I don't mind 3 and can handle 3 well. I love it. But...I've had a lot of people make me second.guess myself. Don't do that. As long as you know your dogs are happy and well cared for...that's what matters. That's all that matters. I hate feeling guilty but with multiple dogs you're bound to at some point IMHO. Just know.. You're a good.owner.
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  #12  
Old 10-16-2013, 02:23 AM
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sometimes... i mean jayson barks the whole ride and nothing calms him. he seems like hes trying to chase cars that pass us. plus his temperment isnt the best for a bring everywhere dog. he doesnt like people. like he likes them but from afar as long as they dont look at him or talk to him. laika loves everyone and shes such a great car rider she just chills. she enjoys the dog park stuff. i did bring jayson with me and laika once and he did ok some ppl pet him as he walked past and he didnt flinch just kept walking... hes also not fond of other male dogs but did well at the park.. when im feeling brave to deal with the head ache i do take him to the lake by himself for swimming. but the barking it just doesnt make it very enjoyable. and with laika im thinking of either trying flyball with her or nose work something to help tire her out mentally because mental games and training sessions just doesnt cut it for her she needs more. but jayson seems more comfortable and happy not coming with me and laika everywhere. he gets the run of the house to do what ever because hes the good one lol
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  #13  
Old 10-16-2013, 04:13 AM
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Yes and no.

Yes, because *I* enjoy doing all these things with my dogs and taking them everywhere and training for all the sports. Therefore, I feel like I should make an equal effort with each of them...

No, because frankly, *they* don't enjoy it to the extent that I do. Limit does NOT enjoy training classes. We still take them on occasion because I feel guilty he isn't in one. He is just as happy to train in the basement and not be exposed to other dogs/weird environments (which is obviously part of the reason we DO training classes haha). Eden is happier with less formal training and more on the fly, random, surprise training. Kastle and Robin THRIVE on traveling/training/practicing everywhere/anywhere all the time. Even though I feel guilty...it's more fair and truly more happy for the dogs to be split into who does more and who does less.

Linds' post is excellent.
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  #14  
Old 10-16-2013, 04:53 AM
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Quote:
It's making me not want any more than two dogs ever again. I hate feeling pulled apart for no good reason.
It's the reason I will probably only have two dogs at a time. Yes, I feel guilty. Meg was my "go everywhere, do everything" dog forever. She still does pretty much every non-formal training thing with me, but she gets left behind for training classes and sometimes practices. It breaks my heart every time I walk over to put my shoes on, and Gusto is eagerly at the door, and Meg walks over to her bed, lies down, and stares at me with what I see as an "I know I'm not going so I won't even ask" look.

But I try (try) to accept that it is MY issue. Yes, Meg likes to go places, but she's also really happy just hanging out at home, as long as I get her what she needs. Probably 3 seconds after I'm out the door, she's asleep and I don't think she's dreaming of getting to go with me.
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Old 10-16-2013, 06:15 AM
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No net yet. My two both pretty much do everything. They both hike, we've done mostly the same classes (with one special one here or there), and they both go to trials. They both are dogs that love training and hiking and going places. I know that will change once I retire Summer and get a new puppy. I'm not looking forward to that but she is getting old and it will happen one day. I still want to take her to trials even when she's retired. My friend brings her senior dogs with her all the time and that's what I want to do as well. Her favorite things about trials are getting to go sit in everyones' laps so she can continue doing that as long as she wants.

I do want to make a continued effort with all my future dogs to try to include them all as much as possible. If I think getting a new dog will diminish what my old dogs get to do, then new dog is not happening. I never want 5-6 dogs again, that is too much. I will probably only have 2 and occasionally 3 (in certain situations) in my lifetime.

Sometimes I feel guilty for not taking Beau and Rose. I know without a doubt that I'd give them a better life than they get with my dad. They love them but they never get walked or anything. Especially Beau, I could give him much better. He's high energy and really should have more. But I just.... they're not my dogs and have never been. The idea of taking in two more senior papillons and tying myself down dog-wise the next 6 years or so is just not something I'm willing to do. If I want to keep doing sports training then a new puppy has to happen in the next couple years. So I feel guilty sometimes. I feel like I should ask to take them but I'm not going to.
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  #16  
Old 10-16-2013, 06:35 AM
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Devan, you're a great home for the Dobes. I don't think there's any reason to feel guilty

I still feel incredibly guilty about Jack. I got him my senior year of high school. He lives with my parents, always has and lives a happy life. But he ADORES me--there's never any question whose dog he is. I used to visit most weekends while I was in college and I always envisioned taking Jack when I found a job & house. But life happened and I moved him into the funeral home where I worked and he panicked and was super unhappy...then I moved into a little house that he would have hated. Then I got Crossbone. Then Jack and Crossbone met and they LOVE each other! Jack has never played with another dog in his life (and he's almost 9). I planned on taking Jack home but then my parents lost Micki & Kyra leaving Jack and Mini. Mini's old and has never been an only dog so right now I'm saying that when Mini's gone Jack will live with us.

I feel guilty every time I think about it or talk about Crossbone. People who don't know the entire situation tell me that I replaced him, he got too old so I had to get a new one, etc. I just haven't been in a place that Jack would be happy in. And I'm not sure he'd be happy home alone all day with Bonehead harassing him. We'll cross that bridge when it comes.

I'm sure he doesn't care. He eats well and lives well and doesn't have annoying Crossbone or me forcing him to do agility or learn tricks!
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  #17  
Old 10-16-2013, 09:05 AM
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I think it's normal for any dog owner with more than one dog to feel guilty at times.

However, I think having that one thing the dog LOVES is a great way to fight that. I got Rider because Harlow just couldn't do the things I wanted. She's a "truck dog". She loves to go to stores and be loved on and lay around or go hiking.. but obviously she cannot herd and she isn't drivey. She will work when she feels like it, but it's not for me. Not only that, she's definitely DH's dog even though she was meant to be mine. Biking and cuddling on the couch is our thing. When we go to inlaws, she's the one that tags along type thing.

Rider.. he's a special one. He loves to train and be crazy and go on short hikes. He likes going to the dog park and meeting new dogs and being social. Harlow doesn't enjoy these things. He's plain and simple not confident to work cattle though, which is something I REALLY want to get involved in. That's where new puppy comes in. Our family does really well with three dogs. When we had four for a period of time, I did feel that dogs got left out more. In saying that though, if our fourth dog worked birds, that niche would be filled. I have a feeling we will stick with three until Harlow passes though.

I really think that one or two dogs is perfect for a single person. I think that if you have two people willing to put in the time/effort, three or four is doable. Rambled thoughts out there.
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  #18  
Old 10-16-2013, 09:50 AM
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The only time a feel bad is when I leave Summit home to do things that I know he would otherwise enjoy but for specific reasons he can't do at the moment.

For example, yesterday I decided to go for a hike with my neighbour and his new little dog. I was going to leave Summit home then had a guilty moment and decided to risk it and take him. Of course half way through the hike the gunshots started and I had to put him back on his leash and force him to finish the hike instead of running back to the truck. Should have left him home and just felt guilty if there ended up being no gun shots. Fall is the worst. Goose season or something I guess.
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  #19  
Old 10-16-2013, 11:37 AM
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Sometimes, yes, especially because we have to gate and rotate. I feel guilty up until I realize nobody wants for any thing and we do so much for them. Each of them gets to do the things they enjoy and I don't feel bad leaving them out of things they don't obviously love.
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  #20  
Old 10-16-2013, 11:43 AM
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Thanks for sharing all of your experiences, guys! I appreciate it.

I guess part of this stemmed from the guy we moved in with saying "why don't you take Keira and Ripley more places?", and my answer to that was honest and there is a good reason that I don't. But then the seed was planted and I started questioning myself. And then their breeder, of all people, is the one who brought up and asked if we'd be willing to give Ripley to this other person because basically we have four dogs and that girl has none and life has changed drastically for my family and I this year and maybe I'd be doing that girl a favour as well as in some regard Ripley (cause he'd get all the individual attention a dober boy could dream of)... she didn't word it quite like that, but that's basically what was implied. She knows they're happy here and doesn't think we should rehome them, but she just thought of this certain situation and thought we might be open. She just thought that I could be the type of person, like she is, to selflessly give a dog to someone who 'needed' him more. And I could if I got the dog knowing that he was a foster and not mine to keep forever, or if I truly felt it was going to be the best situation for all involved. Hard to explain in internet words, but there were no hard feelings about it and no concern. So between those couple of comments, and life's changes, I've just been more stressed than usual and have inadvertently let the Dobermans stress me out too. Especially knowing I will be leaving them sooner than later - it was never the plan to take them with me. But my mom will take care of them as best she can, even if different from what I do with them, and they'll still be taken care of very well. So yeah, there is no need to feel guilty.

Oddly, I never feel guilty about Dance and Journey. I take them often to places together, and even when I don't, I know Dance isn't missing out because she's happiest and most comfortable at home or doing the certain things I do with her. So if I take Journ without her, I don't feel bad at all. It's just the other two for whatever reason.
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