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  #41  
Old 05-16-2013, 11:52 AM
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Julee Julee is offline
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I've had Shadow for nearing 11 years, and I can't say we've ever formed an actual bond like I have with my other dogs. That doesn't mean I don't love her and I haven't tried my damndest to work on it. We just don't click.

That doesn't mean I don't do anything with her. She still goes on hikes, gets training times, gets to go to dog friendly places with me, etc. When I move out, she will remain here, partially due to her age, though mostly because she is bonded with my mother.

I'll be sad when she passes, but I'm not going to be completely heartbroken as I would be with any other dog I own or co-own.

Had I gotten her as a puppy or young adult now, I think we could have worked on it. She's the dog I grew up with, but she's never been "my dog" and that's just how it is.
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Old 05-16-2013, 01:51 PM
SaraB SaraB is offline
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I think bonds take work. I have never just automatically formed a bond with a dog but it's developed over time once we started working as a team. I was scared when I first got Zuma that she wasn't bonding to me but then I realized that I hadn't really done any team building activities with her yet. I was teaching her things, sure. But that isn't really working as a team. Our bond really formed once we began to get in sync on the agility course or when I was able to fully trust her off-leash on hikes. It's the same with Zinga, sure I adored her as a puppy, but that bond is still in it's infancy even now. As we spend more time developing our team work, the bond will follow.

I'm not a believer that bonds just happen and giving up on a dog before putting in work to develop it isn't a valid reason for me.
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  #43  
Old 05-16-2013, 02:03 PM
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HayleyMarie HayleyMarie is offline
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Mitsu and I did not have a crazy bond, she was more Tyler's dog. Those two where meant to be. And in all honesty I would not have kept her if she did not have a heart problem.

But even though I did not have a crazy bond with that dog, I learned so much from her. Even in those short 6 months. And I think partly the bonding issue was with me because I had Teagan, who is my girl. And it was easy for me to stay partly unconnected.

And in saying that just because a dog in not bonded to me does not mean it wont bond to Tyler or someone else in my family. Now if I was into sports and the dog was not just a family pet and it was just not working out, then yes maybe I would consider re-homing, but a family pet. No.
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  #44  
Old 05-16-2013, 05:29 PM
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If I got a dog for me as my personal dog and we didn't bond, I'd be crushed. I spent about two years looking for a dog I knew would be easy to bond with, and I spend hours a day with my dog, so if we didn't bond, I'd be very hurt. I'm not sure what I would do.

On the other hand, I've lived with a couple dogs I had no real bond with. I have basically no bond with Zobby. I like him okay, and he likes me fine, but we're not besties. I don't 'get' him and he thinks I'm pointless. I would never demand that Donny get rid of his dog because we weren't bonded; he's not really bonded to Elsie.

My parents have a dog, Sheila, that's no one's dog, really. She was Patriot's dog, and he died last summer. She's twelve, though, and she gets along with everyone just fine, but she isn't tight with any particular person. Sure, she might have been better off if, when she was one or two we'd realized she wasn't ever going to be bonded to any of us and sent her somewhere where she'd be an only dog, but I think she's been happy in her life; she gets played with and talked to, petted and brushed, fed and bathed, and I don't think she realizes there's a lack, if that makes sense.

So a family dog, I wouldn't get rid of, unless there were a reason. A personal dog... I'm not sure. I'm a one-dog-at-a-time person, so it's very important that I have a close bond with my dog. On the other hand, I only have one dog, so as long as I choose a dog that fits me (high energy, smart, focused, driven, all that) the bond will come.
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Old 05-16-2013, 09:28 PM
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JacksonsMom JacksonsMom is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Red.Apricot View Post
If I got a dog for me as my personal dog and we didn't bond, I'd be crushed. I spent about two years looking for a dog I knew would be easy to bond with, and I spend hours a day with my dog, so if we didn't bond, I'd be very hurt. I'm not sure what I would do.

On the other hand, I've lived with a couple dogs I had no real bond with. I have basically no bond with Zobby. I like him okay, and he likes me fine, but we're not besties. I don't 'get' him and he thinks I'm pointless. I would never demand that Donny get rid of his dog because we weren't bonded; he's not really bonded to Elsie.

My parents have a dog, Sheila, that's no one's dog, really. She was Patriot's dog, and he died last summer. She's twelve, though, and she gets along with everyone just fine, but she isn't tight with any particular person. Sure, she might have been better off if, when she was one or two we'd realized she wasn't ever going to be bonded to any of us and sent her somewhere where she'd be an only dog, but I think she's been happy in her life; she gets played with and talked to, petted and brushed, fed and bathed, and I don't think she realizes there's a lack, if that makes sense.

So a family dog, I wouldn't get rid of, unless there were a reason. A personal dog... I'm not sure. I'm a one-dog-at-a-time person, so it's very important that I have a close bond with my dog. On the other hand, I only have one dog, so as long as I choose a dog that fits me (high energy, smart, focused, driven, all that) the bond will come.

This.

Also, Sheila sounds similar to my dads JRT mix, Lilly. She's a huge part of our family and our lives and we all love her, but I wouldn't necessarily say she has 'her' person. She's closest to my dad, I would say, but he doesn't really consider her 'his' dog per say. She's definitely more of a family dog.

She's happy to run around outside in the yard in the summer all day when all the kiddos are off school and in/out of the pool. She spends ALL day out there in the summer, just loves it. Whenever I am over there, she gives me tons of kisses, and gets super excited to see me. She'll gladly go on a walk with me, or for a car ride, if I ask her to. Sometimes I give her a bath, sometimes my step-mom does, sometimes I feed her, sometimes my dad does, etc.

Whereas, Buddy, their dachshund mix, is TOTALLY my step-mom's dog. Yes he is always happy to see me, etc, but he very much wants to be by 'his' mom at all times. She's the only one allowed to give him baths, groom him, or do anything to him like that. He's always very concerned when she's not home and waits for her, etc. And Jackson is very clearly my dog as well.

If something were to ever come up with either of those two where they needed to live with me, I would take them. They're not my kind of dogs but I do love them. And they're pretty easy and low maintenance, it wouldn't really throw a rift into Jackson and I's routine in any way.
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  #46  
Old 05-17-2013, 09:35 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mokent View Post
in my opinion you always bond with a dog!
If you say so
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  #47  
Old 05-17-2013, 10:00 AM
ruffiangirl ruffiangirl is offline
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You have never had a Shiba then. Shibas are very hard dogs to bond with, and they tend to bind strongly with one person, my bitch, Ruffian, bonded with me, Tonka on the other hand bonded with her. I spent loads of time alone with him while I was showing him, Ruffian stayed home for that, and obedience and handling classes and training, still he bonded with her. He in his 15 years never ever ever bonded with a person, ever.
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  #48  
Old 05-17-2013, 10:22 AM
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MericoX MericoX is offline
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Stryder and I don't have as strong a bond as I do with the other three (the same could've been said for Tsuki). He and I don't mesh well on a training level, everything takes three times as long as everyone else and most of the time it's just a chore to do anything with them. That being said, I love him with all my heart and we're both content with him being mostly a "house pet". I did take him to a fun run late last year which he did really well in, so we'll probably do some more thing year, though I'm not holding my breath over it.
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  #49  
Old 05-17-2013, 10:58 AM
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meepitsmeagan meepitsmeagan is offline
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I bonded to Harlow (even though she's a little sh**) instantly. No work at all. Harlow likes me, but she is definitely Josh's girl.

Rider, on the other hand. Yikes. It took a lot. I was working with him regularly, and up until about two? months ago we were still talking about returning him to the rescue. He just has so many weird quirks and he's such a different dog from what we wanted.. and now he's just my little dude and I couldn't see myself without him. It was literally like flipping a switch. One night, I'm crying because we were going to ship him back to WY, three days later, I'm in love. It was weird.

Josh is TOO bonded to the foster right now. I'm trying really hard to talk sense into him and he's just googly eyes over Lucy. And she is definitely loving him too. It's a problem.
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  #50  
Old 05-17-2013, 11:21 AM
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Julee Julee is offline
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Keeeeep herrrrr.....
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