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  #11  
Old 05-08-2013, 11:40 AM
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sassafras sassafras is offline
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Also, the more I think about it... even though it may not be fair or "right," I would probably give the camera up. Because if he is still paying it off while you have it, every time he sees that bill it's like giving him a reminder and it's going to be brought to the forefront of his mind. And I would want to drop back to the back burner as much as possible. Sucks, but not the hill I would want to die on.

I'd keep the laptop, though.
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  #12  
Old 05-08-2013, 12:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dizzy View Post
I think this is the most coherent you've ever posted

And well done, you are doing great.
This. I also agree with Sass on the camera thing. I don't know you other than a few posts on here, and I'm terrified for you. I definitely think you're doing the best thing for you and the baby. I'm happy things are starting to look up a bit. Keep us posted!
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  #13  
Old 05-08-2013, 12:36 PM
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First of all, WELCOME TO TEXAS!!! I live in Fort Worth and this is really a great state and DFW has so very much to offer in jobs, education, cost of living is decent and no state income tax is a plus!

I think as long as you are being honest with your employer, and it sounds like you are, they very well may work with you. They hired you at 6 months pregnant knowing full well you will require a little time off after the baby is born so they know there have to be some physical limitations to your abilities for the short term. A stool at the register would help a lot I am sure. It has been very hot here this week and with all that is going on, you probably just need to slow down and take it one day at a time. That is all you can do. I have a desk job, but I worked with both of my children until the day before they were born.

I think you did the right thing by moving away from Josh as well. Things will only get worse after the baby is born and he thinks he has lost even more control of you so the distance will be a very good thing. And don't think twice about the computer. After rereading, I almost agree with the camera being given up as well. I would do my best not to engage with him about it anymore though than you have to, and keep in close contact with your attorney bc they are the one who will make sure you have dotted all your I's and crossed all your T's.

Good luck to you. I hope all goes well!!! I'm not sure exactly when we are moving our son out of his crib and into a bed, but it might be pretty soon, but will definately be by the end of the summer. If you haven't gotten a crib yet, I would be happy to give you ours when we are done with it. I know I used a Pack N Play with both kids for the first 6 weeks to 6 months. If you end up waiting to purchase one, let me know before you do if you are interested and I will let you know where we stand on it. Same goes with a high chair...which you wouldn't need for awhile anyway. We are close to done with that though too.
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  #14  
Old 05-08-2013, 01:01 PM
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I agree with Dizzy, this post is much more rational and healthy-sounding than many of your previous posts, which is great to see!

Congratulations on your move to Dallas! I hope you find a lot of opportunities there, both for yourself and Ryland.

As far as blacking out at work...it probably did have to do with the heat/activity/etc. Make sure you stay EXTREMELY well hydrated, and I agree that asking your boss for things like a portable fan (or even bringing a little handheld battery one) and chances to sit down are important. You probably aren't going to be able to be on your feet all day for much longer. Even if it's just a stool behind the register, you're going to need a few chances to rest throughout the day.

The most important thing is going to be noticing when you're about to black out...for me, I start to feel very hot, and my vision starts to go black, first peripherally and then all over. If I get dizzy/lightheaded, I need to sit, or it just gets worse. At the point where my vision is blacking, it's pretty much too late to find a seat, so I will just sit on the ground because I don't want to fall.
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  #15  
Old 05-08-2013, 01:58 PM
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I have been in a similar situation. Feel free to PM me if you ever want to talj to someone in confidence about what you are going through. You sound like you are doing much better.
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  #16  
Old 05-08-2013, 07:43 PM
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It's good to hear that a lot is turning around for you! Dallas is a great city, I love visiting there. I think getting away from your ex is a good thing too.
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  #17  
Old 05-08-2013, 11:57 PM
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I would change my phone number & my provider if I had to to stop the harassment, & inform the police, I believe in TX just what he is doing now (the threats he has made) if he does show up you could have him arrested on the spot & I bet LA would also want him since I believe he is on probation & is not allowed to cross state lines.

I would be going to court to expunge his name from my kids life apply for sole custody ... Better the little rascal grow up with no father then have one in his life like josh (sorry to be blunt but it's true). "D " sounds like a better "father" figure even if he is just a friend for a while (which is HOW HE SHOULD STAY for. Looooooong time) then josh.

Also I don't know if you know this but Texas has some of the most lax gun laws (yeah ... We like our 2nd amendment even our govna's a sharp shooter) so if I was you I would get a gun, & take classes & learn i how to use it ... Well. That way IF (I don't think he will due to being on probation ... Or so I think you mentioned at one time ) but if he does you'll be ready pump his dead beat ass full of metal.

Now I know this sounds extreme ... But remember I own guns myself & padlock my properties front gate to detour trespassers so I don't take threats lightly & if someone was threatening my DOGS that way the procedure would be the same ... So I can't imagine what I would do if my unborn child was in possible danger. Oh yeah I know presently I would give the offender a chance to leave in Josh's case I would shoot first & ask later.

Sorry if that sounds horrible ... But remember HE has already threatened YOU & more then once & I have the horrible feeling he might make good on it if he gets a chance which is why I would want to be prepared if it was me.

Oh & I almost forgot! Welcome to Texas I am down San Antonio way, if your down my way give me a shout. If you need anything, if things get bad & you ... Say need someone to take your dogs for a while or something give me a shout ... I'm only a 5 he drive from big D.
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  #18  
Old 05-09-2013, 12:02 AM
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Oh I also forgot to ad about the camera ... Yeah I would give that back ... You can always buy another when things get better.

Oh & keep up the good work, your doing great also from a Texan to a Texan. If you want to talk you may PM me as well.

If you can't change phone numbers you can always call your company & have his number blocked.
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  #19  
Old 05-09-2013, 09:16 AM
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What if you choose not to recognize a father? And just leave him off the birth certificate? Do you really think he would press the issue?
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  #20  
Old 05-09-2013, 09:27 AM
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Sounds like a really nice guy. The camera and laptop are yours, he's a ****ing dbag. But I would send them back and then cut off all contact. The only thing he cares about is the few hundred bucks he could get for the camera, give it back and he'll be out of your life. I think giving up a camera to have him gone would be worth it.
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