If your OH was uncomfortable with your opposite sex friends would you give them up?

[yv0nne]

Originally Posted by CaliTerp07

I really think there's a huge difference between boyfriends and husbands. When you make the commitment to get married, a lot changes (for me, anyway). An example is this:



I would listen to my husband's requests well before those of my parents at this point in my life. Those are the vows I took (Leave your family, cleave to your spouse). I wouldn't let anyone "tell" me what to do, parents or spouse--but if my husband says, "I want you to do xyz" and my parents say, "We'd rather you did abc", husband's request will win every time.

Yeah, I was more thinking when you lived under your parents roof lol at this point, if my parents said something I would consider it because they are intelligent people with my best interests at heart, but it certainly wouldn't be automatic that I would do it!

[DJEtzel]

Most likely, no.

If it was a new friend, I could see the discomfort, and I really wouldn't be making a friendship like that anyway.

My best friend is our age and I've been best friends with him since middle school. When either of us gets a new significant other, before anything gets serious, we introduce them to each other, because neither of us will tolerate bad feelings in a relationship because of each other. So I met his new girlfriend after a few dates and she's cool, we kind of rely on each other's approval too, as odd as that seems. And Jakob met Brian after we had been hanging out for a little while. Brian doesn't like Jakob at all, just because of a personality difference, but he has zero problem with me being friend with him, going to his house, staying the night, etc. We're the sort of best friends that everything thinks HAS to turn into something more... but... we've been friends for almost 9 years now and nothing has happened or thought of happening, and we're open books with each other.

So in short, if Brian decided that he didn't want me hanging out with Jakob anymore, I would kick him to the curb, period. Jakob is my best friend and has been around a lot longer than Brian and probably will be, so I'm not choosing a guy over him. It's like choosing a guy over your dogs, ya know?

[milos_mommy]

I'd also be really hesitant to believe someone who was THAT insecure and suspected me of cheating so easily would be either cheating himself, or insecure enough that cheating, or at least really inappropriate behavior, would be acceptable to him.

In my experience, people who are that lacking in self-confidence and that unsure of their relationship, will seek approval or anything to boost their confidence in really inappropriate ways. Whether it's cheating, or seeking compliments/flirtation from outside the relationship, or acting out inappropriately for attention, I don't know anyone who's really insecure in their relationship (needlessly) who doesn't do these things.