He cheated on me.

[Danefied]

Originally Posted by Barbara!

Will he ever want me back? How can he be with someone else.... I just don't understand. I'm pregnant with his child.

Did you think being pregnant would help you "keep" Josh?

[Baxter'smybaby]

Originally Posted by Barbara!

Right now, if he were to want me back, I would say yes. Because my heart still loves him and I wouldn't be strong enough to turn him away. Maybe, in a few months... Maybe I will be stronger. And if he wants me back, I may be able to say no. But right now all I see is bleak and pain and I just... I'm in such a dark place.

I haven't eaten in 4 days but I am still making sure to take my prenatal vitamins and I may get some pediasure shakes or something to drink and keep my nutrients up. I just can't sit and eat a meal. Anybody know of anything like that that is good tasting and nutritious?

Also guys, I know I don't seem normal. I have a lot of mental issues that make my reactions to things very...not normal. When he was talking about not loving me, I would throw myself to the floor and scream and hyperventilate... Because I feel like I'm dying. When I found out about that girl... I was initially strong..then I went into a fit and couldn't breathe and fainted in my bed because I couldn't stop screaming.

ok--so right here, this screams to ME that you need to seek counseling--someone to help you with emotional coping strategies, as well as figuring out some real life strategies. I can't say this enough--you are responsible for your child--you MUST figure this out to care for this baby, while it is still inside of you--what you do now has an impact on that child's development in utero. If you need help finding a therapist, doctor, etc--can your parents help out? If not, I know there are some very knowledgeable people on chaz who might be able to direct you to some hotlines, etc. YOU NEED HELP NOW! And I don't mean rambling on chaz kind of help. Sorry if I sound insensitive--I feel as if you are either playing games here, or you need assistance to move in a positive direction.

[Barbara!]

Originally Posted by Danefied

Did you think being pregnant would help you "keep" Josh?

Honestly? I don't know. I didn't GET pregnant for that reason.., but when he brought up the whole not loving me thing.. I figured it would motivate him to try. And I still think it would have....if he hadn't met this girl.

[Grab]

Originally Posted by Barbara!

Honestly? I don't know. I didn't GET pregnant for that reason.., but when he brought up the whole not loving me thing.. I figured it would motivate him to try. And I still think it would have....if he hadn't met this girl.

Children are never a fix to a broken relationship. In fact, if you don't have a solid relationship in the first place, having children can actually drive you apart. Nothing like consistent lack of sleep and low finances to make every issue seem way larger than it is.

It is convenient to blame his meeting this other girl, but the relationship was fractured beforehand. Which he tried to tell you, you just did not choose to listen.

This does not mean he is not a douche...because he most certainly is.


ETA: As stated above, definitely seek counseling. It's fine and dandy to say 'this is how I react, I know it's not normal' when it's just you. But currently, your body is not simply your own. Not eating is not acceptable when you are supposed to be providing nutrients to your child. Vitamins are not enough. It's vital that you get a professional's assistance on how to better cope with things...when you have an infant, going on not eating strikes and throwing yourself around/fainting whenever someone tells you something you don't like, will not be something that is acceptable.

[Barbara!]

Originally Posted by Grab

Children are never a fix to a broken relationship. In fact, if you don't have a solid relationship in the first place, having children can actually drive you apart. Nothing like consistent lack of sleep and low finances to make every issue seem way larger than it is.

It is convenient to blame his meeting this other girl, but the relationship was fractured beforehand. Which he tried to tell you, you just did not choose to listen.

This does not mean he is not a douche...because he most certainly is.

He didn't say anything to me about not being in love with me anymore until two weeks after we found out I was pregnant... AFTER he met this new girl.

I'm not trying to take the blame off of him and onto the girl... He should have walked away, and he chose not to. That's what fires me up... He chose not to walk away from her, and chose to just jump straight into a new relationship.

[Taqroy]

Originally Posted by Barbara!

He didn't say anything to me about not being in love with me anymore until two weeks after we found out I was pregnant... AFTER he met this new girl.

I'm not trying to take the blame off of him and onto the girl... He should have walked away, and he chose not to. That's what fires me up... He chose not to walk away from her, and chose to just jump straight into a new relationship.

I'm pretty sure you posted about how he was texting another girl BEFORE you found out you were pregnant. Not that it matters because, uh, he LEFT YOU. You're acting like you're in high school and it's getting really old. You're an adult and you're going to be a parent. You need to get your **** together and get some serious help. It really looks like you don't care at all about the baby unless you can use it as a chain to shackle Josh to you. And that's really sad, for both you and the kid.

[Danefied]

Barbara, what would be the ideal outcome for you? If you could wave a magic wand and make everything "good", what would "good" look like?

[Fran101]

Originally Posted by Taqroy

I'm pretty sure you posted about how he was texting another girl BEFORE you found out you were pregnant. Not that it matters because, uh, he LEFT YOU. You're acting like you're in high school and it's getting really old. You're an adult and you're going to be a parent. You need to get your **** together and get some serious help. It really looks like you don't care at all about the baby unless you can use it as a chain to shackle Josh to you. And that's really sad, for both you and the kid.

This.
I have stayed out of these threads thus far, because every time I think to type a post I fear I'm being too harsh but frankly you need to hear it again and again until it sinks in

you are having a BABY, raising a child. A living, breathing, thinking, future of our world CHILD. A child who you are ALREADY neglecting by not taking care of yourself and stressing over stuff that doesn't matter.

Who cares about this guy? Who cares about the girl? He left you, he said he didn't love you, he didn't call you from jail, he has CONSISTENTLY pushed you away.. I'm SHOCKED you are surprised by all this but more than that, I am shocked that THIS is what you are worrying about. It's like you care more about this stupid high school DRAMA with this guy over the baby you are growing inside of you!

You had your time to wallow. He has moved on, so should you.. if not for you than for the sake of your child.
Not eating is unacceptable and completely and totally selfish. This baby is INNOCENT in all this and depending on you. Everyone hates breakups, everyone gets sad and wants to wallow and cry... but your body and what you do to it is not just about you anymore! You need to GET IT TOGETHER AND GET HELP.

You are raising a child. You need to find a way to support yourself, a place to live, a plan, a job, a schedule, supplies.. You have MUCH bigger fish to fry than your stupid boyfriend and his garbage!

You are going be feeding, caring, loving, changing, and soothing this baby largely on your own. Being a single parent is a huge undertaking and you need to be ready.. START PREPARING. Make a list, start checking off things you need to do. STOP WALLOWING IN SELF PITY!

You need to grow up and start being a parent.. that means putting that baby's well being ABOVE your own.
and frankly if you can't get it together and BE READY for this child and get over this.. I think you need to think LONG AND HARD about if you are even ready to be a parent.

[ACooper]

Originally Posted by Taqroy

I'm pretty sure you posted about how he was texting another girl BEFORE you found out you were pregnant. Not that it matters because, uh, he LEFT YOU. You're acting like you're in high school and it's getting really old. You're an adult and you're going to be a parent. You need to get your **** together and get some serious help. It really looks like you don't care at all about the baby unless you can use it as a chain to shackle Josh to you. And that's really sad, for both you and the kid.

If you read this when Tag posted, and again with Fran reposted.........PLEASE....read it AGAIN.

[Dogdragoness]

I know this is going to sound really harsh & insensitive... but I am starting to doubt that she can do the parent thing, of course there is nothing she can do about it now. But I just worry about the Welfare of this child & if her mental health is well enough to handle a child which is not going to be easy (& you thought your problems with Baloo were bad :/).

Also I have also seen you say a few times that Josh "decided" to have unprotected sex & what not ... Uh sorry but no ... You BOTH decided to have unprotected sex TOGETHER! You could've insisted on a condom (tho heinsight is always 20/20).