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  #21  
Old 12-09-2012, 10:58 PM
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Originally Posted by sillysally View Post
I'm fine with it when used as an incentive for good behavior. Also, if we are talking about people who where married before the spouse went to prison, intimacy can help keep the marriage together for the long haul if the guy gets out. If someone is going to be released it makes sense to me that the more they have to come home to the more incentive they have to stay out of trouble.
I totally agree with this.
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  #22  
Old 12-09-2012, 11:30 PM
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But isn't the goal (or shouldn't the goal) of jail to make it so people don't commit more crimes?

If so shouldn't fixing people be the plan. Punishing them and making them harder and less likely to reintegrate is only going to push them to more crime..
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Originally Posted by Jules View Post
I am all for it when it is used as a good reward. We NEED to focus on rehabilitation instead of incarceration.

I know I've said it a thousand times before and I'll say it again: across the border, so so many, if not most offenders have a sad history. No, not growing up poor or simply having it rough, these are men (and women) who fall through the cracks. People who stopped
to school in 6th, 7th, 8th grade. They don't have a future to support themselves and a lot of them don't have the mental capabilities to even comprehend. We need to give them tools to succeed in life, and even if it is something as stupid and silly as rewarding good behavior with a night with their wife then so be it. They need to be taught what it means to be a good citizen as nobody ever cared to show them before.
Those that I have known that have done time in prison usually reoffend. Actually I don't know any that didn't. I know ONE that has managed to stay out for a little while, but he is still quietly dealing pot and pills. I was just writing to say I don't know any violent offenders, but I looked up one of my old friends and he is in prison until 2017 for serious domestic charges. You look them up and it's multiple charges year after year.

Obviously I don't know what programs they went through (other than the FL prison system), but there's definitely an issue there.

Those that I know that reoffended..well, they have nothing to work for. They don't get gainfully employed because of their history. They don't have families. Usually 20 something men that live off warehouse jobs and get into trouble. Then they get back out when they are 30 and get into more trouble. It sucks. My ex (I was kind of stupid) had been in the system (juvie) since he was 13 and has spent MOST of his adult life in prison, house arrest, or on probation. I left him when he was on house arrest and found out he was going out to bars when he was not supposed to. I'm alright if you are working to better yourself but I wouldn't put up with putting yourself at that much risk to go back. He got arrested a month after I broke up with him and was in prison for like 3 years...smh.

And you know, maybe it IS the system keeping them down, but maybe the repeated offenders are just meant to be like that. There's just some people you have to shrug your shoulders at, what are you going to do if they won't help themselves...
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  #23  
Old 12-10-2012, 04:17 AM
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A lot of people behind bars are not violent people. Many of them have made stupid decisions. Staying together would be very hard if the significant other is imprisoned. It would not be unusual for couples to drift away from each other and finally break the relationship off. Interestingly, a lot of couples would stay together despite the hardship. Is it true love? Love and commitment? Whatever the reason they would look forward to the telephone sessions and to conjugal visits. Conjugal visit is a privilege given to an inmate for good behavior. If this kind of "reward" would somehow ease the loneliness of the couple and would prevent prison violence then why not?
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  #24  
Old 12-10-2012, 10:03 AM
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I agree that prisons focus should be rehab, not punishment.

Conjugal visits I am fine with for the most part, i am sure I could think of exceptions but in general, anything that keeps people connected, keeps their empathy in check (which sex in and of itself doesnt I realize but for someone who is truly in a loving relationship it will help), etc.

Now, the women marrying strangers in jail, that does totally ick me out.
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Old 12-10-2012, 10:10 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sillysally View Post
I'm fine with it when used as an incentive for good behavior. Also, if we are talking about people who where married before the spouse went to prison, intimacy can help keep the marriage together for the long haul if the guy gets out. If someone is going to be released it makes sense to me that the more they have to come home to the more incentive they have to stay out of trouble.
This.

Besides the issue of conjugal visits, our prison systems need an entire reform. Prisons just teach inmates to be better criminals, rather than reforming them into productive members of society.
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  #26  
Old 12-10-2012, 10:20 AM
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To quote Andy Dufrense, "The funny thing is - on the outside, I was an honest man, straight as an arrow. I had to come to prison to be a crook. "

As to the topic - I have no issue with conjugal visits as a reward for good behavior. It seems to work in "the world" - why else would a man do the dishes if he didn't think he'd get a "reward"?
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