Roommate etiquitte?

[smkie]

Headphones or extra pillows. If I had to have a room mate then I would just tolerate this part of it. Being stuck with all the rent and utilities, would be worse.

Originally Posted by StephyMei1112

Yes but you think that having that all happening at 3 AM is OK? With lights, loud voices, and raucus and all?

Do I think it's OK at 3am? Yep. Why would you move in with someone who has a night schedule and a girlfriend, and act surprised when they make noise at night?

I'm also very surprised that a tenant...or (especially) an apartment manager would allow you to sign a lease when you have no verifiable employment or proof that you have enough in savings to cover expenses for the duration of the lease.

[StephyMei1112]

To each their own then...

[milos_mommy]

If you're paying half the rent I would approach it by saying "is it ok if we establish some quiet hours during the week?". It's not unreasonable for him to be up until 3 giggling with his girlfriend on Friday night, but all week and its going to get old fast. Ask him if he minds keeping it down on nights you have work early and in turn offer to go out and give them some privacy one night.

Also, if they're blasting music and cackling at 3am, that's uncalled for. If they're watching a movie at a low volume or talking quietly, you need to suck it up. Ear plugs, eye mask, welcome to sharing a studio

[Renee750il]

One thing, too, is if they're making enough noise at 3 a.m. that it seeps through the walls the other tenants in the adjoining apartments are bound to start complaining, and that puts both of you in a situation with the landlord, so that might be a way to approach it.

You're both getting equal benefit from the space and you being there, since you're paying half, so consideration is due as a matter of course.

With the extra money he's saving by your paying half the rent and utilities, he could be taking his girlfriend out a lot more. Wonder if she's realized that yet

[AdrianneIsabel]

Originally Posted by SevenSins

Do I think it's OK at 3am? Yep. Why would you move in with someone who has a night schedule and a girlfriend, and act surprised when they make noise at night?

I'm also very surprised that a tenant...or (especially) an apartment manager would allow you to sign a lease when you have no verifiable employment or proof that you have enough in savings to cover expenses for the duration of the lease.

Yeah, it's very hard to get an apartment with no stable income.

We needed 400-600 credit score, income proof, and a 400$ security deposit(higher with lower credit) plus 500 for our dogs. Then we are locked in for 3 months (shortest we could find). We were begging to crash and pay rent anywhere but no one let us, I think you're lucky.

[Dogdragoness]

Originally Posted by SevenSins

It's his apartment, how does "in your own home" qualify as a "public display of affection?" I'm sorry if you're so lonely in your own life that seeing other people happy makes you want to hurl. Really, I am.



Uh huh...

Seriously though, OP, you've been there three days, it was his apartment first, adults are allowed to date and you cannot reasonably expect people to not laugh, giggle, talk or display affection in your presence. Buy some ear plugs and don't watch them if they bother you so much.

If guests/roommates are present I consider it PDA, genteel PDA is cute (holding hands, the cutesy smooch, hugging etc ...) but the way she is explaining it (groping, giggling, "spooning") no I don't think that is appropriate when someone else is present in the home ... If they are by themselves then by all means GTT (go to town).

That's all I was saying ... If its making someone else UNCOMFORTABLE then no it becomes not ok.

[sillysally]

Originally Posted by Dogdragoness

Then yes you do have a say ... Blech just reading that lovey dovey stuff makes me want to hurl I hate PDA :P having recently started to get good at Spanish & working at the race track for so long ... So I get the language barrier thing.

It's not a PDA when you are in your own house. If they were bending over the counter having sex while preparing breakfast I could see that being an issue, but cook spooning...eh.

I have a work bench next to a woman who was born in Korea and came to the US as a young woman, and deal with a language barrier on a daily basis with her. The more you talk with her though the better you will get at understanding what she is trying to say. Is "Sun" short for something do you know (I'm curious because my co-worker has a longer name that she shortens to "Sunny" or "Sun")?

I might ask about quiet hours or something. Does he work nights? When I worked 4 pm-12 am it was very common for me to be doing stuff at 3 am, because I was just up then. However, realize that you are sharing a studio apartment and are frankly lucky to have the roof over your head. If he doesn't seem receptive to quiet hours I'd let it go, at least until I had a day job and could actually say that I had to be up the next morning for something.

[MilliesMom]

And if the definition of Studio IS "one big-tush room and a bathroom", being in the kitchen area might just be as private as they can get, short of tying up the bathroom for God-knows-how-long (and the germophobe part of me is shrieking "EWW! EWW! EWWWWW!!!!")

[Renee750il]

Seems like the crux of this is "sharing" and "paying half."

There is some consideration that comes with that. If someone's just crashing and isn't contributing rent and utilities, then no, they don't get much expectation.