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Old 11-09-2012, 12:35 PM
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Default How to save yourself from toxic people

I really liked this article. I think it's very helpful and there are some good links as well to check out. What do you think about it?

http://www.wikihow.com/Save-Yourself-from-Toxic-People
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"When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty."

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Old 11-09-2012, 01:46 PM
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Nice. I just skimmed it, I want to read it more thoroughly later after I run some errands
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Old 11-09-2012, 04:56 PM
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It would be easier if they'd just let us shoot 'em.

And then they wouldn't go out and do it to someone else.
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Old 11-09-2012, 07:26 PM
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I needed this! Thank you
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Old 11-10-2012, 08:19 AM
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Isn't that the truth Renee. LOL. Some of those toxic people can seep into your life so insidiously, you don't even recognize right away what it's doing to you.

Oh good SkyRock. I think lots of us need to be reminded of this stuff once in a while because it's so easy to get caught up with toxic people and not really know how to handle them exactly. Some are easy to simply weed out of your life and some not so easy....if they're family. It can be complicated and downright debilitating in some cases.
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"If you love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen." -- Samuel Adams 1776





"When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty."

Thomas Jefferson
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Old 11-10-2012, 10:35 AM
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Or you're raised with/by them, so it takes awhile to realize that it's not the normal course of events.
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In a controversy the instant we feel anger we have already ceased striving for the truth, and have begun striving for ourselves. ~Buddha

Stupid is the most notoriously incurable and contagious disease known to mankind. If you find yourself in close proximity to someone infected with stupid, walk away as soon as said infection is noted.


There are few things more nauseating than pure obedience. ~ Kvothe

***8206;"silence is the language of god, all else is poor translation."
Rumi
Be a god. Know when to shut up.


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  #7  
Old 11-10-2012, 11:04 AM
Kilter Kilter is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Renee750il View Post
Or you're raised with/by them, so it takes awhile to realize that it's not the normal course of events.

EXACTLY!!!!!

My family is very toxic. To the point that they don't know where I live, have my number or see us. We are 'no contact' with them, because there's no middle ground or talking to them and sorry, do not want to have to either take medication to stay sane with the stress they add or have to monitor every single detail of a situation to make sure it's good and healthy for my kids.

My mother is the main issue but her personality issues have been passed down to my siblings and my father and they all do the same things and support the toxic behavior.

It's ok for my mother to tell her then 8 year old grandchild that 'grandma will still love you when she dies' and then talk about killing herself. It's also ok for grandma to take over parenting choices and do things against the actual parent's wishes because 'she knows what she's doing'. Or support her son in his gambling and drug issues by providing him with a free place to live, cooked meals and laundry service while he makes great money and goes out all night. It's also ok for the entire family to 'block' members who aren't walking the line (which is why we ended up not talking to them, what good is family when you can't reach any of them at all - not saying they didn't email within 2 minutes, I mean MONTHS go by with no response).

Anyway for us it's better to cut the tumor out and let it rot elsewhere.

But the article is good for the lessor toxic people out there that you can monitor (in our case anything short of having my mother with a key and the ability to walk in at any time wasn't good enough!).
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Old 11-11-2012, 07:57 AM
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That is so true Renee. And too, there are family members in my case for instance, who have a mix of toxic parts and perfectly good, healthy, and positive traits about them, myself included, I'm sure. But when it's all pervasive and seriously damaging, that is hard to extract yourself from them until you're an adult. And even then, many people don't have the wherewithal to deal with it.

Kilter, you sound like you've had a rough time in your family. It's good that you have separated yourself from that.
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"If you love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen." -- Samuel Adams 1776





"When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty."

Thomas Jefferson
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