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  #21  
Old 10-23-2012, 01:28 PM
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AllisonPitbullLvr AllisonPitbullLvr is offline
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I'm using a midwife (covered by provincial healthcare!) because I wanted hand holding, I wanted the support of pregnancy and birth experts who are women, and I wanted the aftercare once the baby was born. So far they've been wonderful! At 8 weeks I had some bleeding and completely lost my mind. Within two minutes I had one of my midwives on the phone, reassuring me and setting up an ultrasound ASAP. It was fantastic.

I don't have any bump pics yet but I DO have an ultrasound pic. But it won't let me post it here...
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  #22  
Old 10-23-2012, 01:35 PM
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I just want to say that I had a hospital birth, and was under NO pressure for an epidural, c-section, etc. I didn't even have to make a big fuss about avoiding those things. I had made my intentions clear from the beginning, and never once did I feel like I had to tell my doctor to "shove it" or anything of that sort. Honestly, I was encouraged and supported by my entire medical team, and after my son was born I was part of the hospital "tour", because all the nurses wanted to see "that first time mom that went all natural!" lol

When my son was one week past due and nearly 9lbs according to the ultrasound, my doctor and I talked is out (ie: she asked me my feelings on the matter) and together we scheduled an induction for the following week as a failsafe. In the end, we didn't need it. He was born later that night naturally, no drugs, no surgery.

Yes, you need to be clear with your doctor(s) about what you want to happen, but it just... makes me sad that people assume they have to go into everything with guns ablazing to get their way. I do realize that there are pushy doctors out there, and I'm not trying to discount that. I just don't think it's fair to assume EVERY doctor is.

Also, from a collection of stories from my friends... well, let's just say I wouldn't blame their doctors. I had a cousin that tried to schedule an early c-section in order to line up the birth with her mom's vacation from work. I had a friend that requested an early induction because she was just "too tired of waiting around." Both of those cases, they posted all over Facebook about how it wasn't fair that their doctors weren't listening to them.




Okay. Sorry. I just had to get that out.




On the subject of baby gear... my advice is to take it easy. Put in a good amount of research and make a solid investment in a car seat. That is priority #1, in my opinion. Yes there are a lot of things you will need to have ready before Day 1 (crib or bassinette, changing station, etc.) but you aren't going to need a high chair right away, or any big play equipment. You can take some time on those things.

Strollers are a definite "maybe", depending on your personal style. We got an umbrella-style stroller frame that the carseat/carrier fit into early on, because we like to go out and about. But that was just us.

I also say... take all parenting advice with a little grain of salt. Everybody will have advice. Now, I don't mean to say that you should disregard all advice, but just realize that even when people are telling you to do something different, it does NOT mean you are doing anything wrong. Nothing is set in stone, and rarely (if ever) is there only one option to anything. You just have to learn to do what works for you, your child, and your family.

Above all else, just do the best you can, take your time to learn what you need, and RELAX. There will be tough days. There will be exhausting days. They will always get better.
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  #23  
Old 10-23-2012, 01:35 PM
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I have babies fast. Briggs was 3.5 from the time Ipcould feel a contraction with the last hour being pushing. Blake was 2.5 from first contraction to birth and i only pushed for 15 minutes. Blake's labor made me understand why people take drugs. I was regretting not asking for them right away those last 5 minutes because they were no longer an option. I labor too fast for painkillers. I will probably never experience any pain meds or an epidural while in labor. It hurts but I think most people could hold out if they thought it would only last 3 hours.

I breastfeed and I babywear. I am very much one of those attachment paretning types. I dont do it because its the new craze. Its how I was raised and its what feels right to me.
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  #24  
Old 10-23-2012, 01:39 PM
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sparks19 sparks19 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by milos_mommy View Post
Sparks, didn't you switch to formula because Hannah had an allergy to milk or something? Or am I totally imagining that?
she didn't have an actual allergy but milk gave her an upset stomach (she still has issues with milk and I have to restrict her access to it to one cup a day or she gets really constipated)

I wasn't positive it was milk that was the problem at the time but whenever I would nurse her she would have an upset tummy or just be fussy in general. I thought maybe she wasn't getting enough so I started just pumping and supplementing with formula. She was still having issues and my supply was dwindling quickly. Then we tried soy formula and that seemed to fix the issue.

but the kid LOVES milk. it's ridiculous lol. So I have to be strict on the one glass of milk a day rule lol. We tried the almond milk but she doesnt like it, she wants the real thing lol
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  #25  
Old 10-23-2012, 01:43 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maxfox426 View Post

I also say... take all parenting advice with a little grain of salt. Everybody will have advice. Now, I don't mean to say that you should disregard all advice, but just realize that even when people are telling you to do something different, it does NOT mean you are doing anything wrong. Nothing is set in stone, and rarely (if ever) is there only one option to anything. You just have to learn to do what works for you, your child, and your family.

Above all else, just do the best you can, take your time to learn what you need, and RELAX. There will be tough days. There will be exhausting days. They will always get better.
THis is soooooo important it should be in caps and bolded. LOL When I had my daughter I had everyone under the sun giving me advice and getting nasty if I didn't agree, or do it perfectly their way. I start to get so stressed out. Then a very special woman(who was also a grandmother) sat with me and told me that advice is just that. Advice. THat there is no way to please everyone so I should concintrate on what worked for me and my baby. That dropped my stress level a lot. I was also taking parenting courses as well at the time and this advice helped me to start speaking up in class and asking questions that led to some really great discussions for the whole class. Awsome post.
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  #26  
Old 10-23-2012, 01:59 PM
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Aw... babies!

I second Dr. Sears' book - such a gold mine, and he is so supportive of the mom doing what feels right for HER and her baby. I love that about it.

My guys were preemies, twins, and baby B had a deformity of her umbilical cord. Had she been a singleton, they would have taken her at 27 weeks when they discoverd it since that deformity eventually results in fetal death. Instead they hospitalized me, put me on a fetal monitor, and did twice daily level 2 ultrasounds. Long, long, long story short (that also involves a frantic drive to the hospital in the neighbor's new luxury car with cream colored leather seats while I was having a placental abrubtion), I now have two 100% normal, happy, wonderful kiddos who will be 10 next month <3

I'm a total flower child at heart and I would have loved nothing more than to have a quiet home birth with Sara Mclaughlan playing piano in the background, but the universe has a way of laughing at our best laid plans Its all good though. Like so many things, parenting is about being present for the journey, not arriving at any particular destination.

Speaking of - my new favorite resource is a facebook group, "parenting beyond punishment". I also love "teach through love" or "teach with love" can't remember the title, but also on FB. Great sites!
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  #27  
Old 10-23-2012, 02:09 PM
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Wow, lots to catch up on in here already!

First - Pictures!

20 week ultrasound - it's a girl (not 100% but most likely)


ultrasound by Holga-Jen, on Flickr

And me today at 23.5 weeks:


photo(12) by Holga-Jen, on Flickr
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  #28  
Old 10-23-2012, 02:12 PM
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I have a lot of respect for moms who can post their beautiful bump photos. I on the other hand do not have that kind of bravery even though I have lost 15lbs this pregnancy(haven't gained any weight) I still can't bring myself to do it.
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  #29  
Old 10-23-2012, 02:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AllisonPitbullLvr View Post
I'm using a midwife (covered by provincial healthcare!) because I wanted hand holding, I wanted the support of pregnancy and birth experts who are women, and I wanted the aftercare once the baby was born. So far they've been wonderful! At 8 weeks I had some bleeding and completely lost my mind. Within two minutes I had one of my midwives on the phone, reassuring me and setting up an ultrasound ASAP. It was fantastic.

I don't have any bump pics yet but I DO have an ultrasound pic. But it won't let me post it here...
You're in Canada I assume? Whereabouts? I'm using a midwife too and I LOVE the whole experience so far. We are lucky that they are covered under our healthcare (in *most* provinces).

You have to upload your photo to a hosting site such as Photobucket or Flickr and then post the link using the insert image button. Have you tried that?
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  #30  
Old 10-23-2012, 02:20 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NicoleLJ View Post
I have a lot of respect for moms who can post their beautiful bump photos. I on the other hand do not have that kind of bravery even though I have lost 15lbs this pregnancy(haven't gained any weight) I still can't bring myself to do it.
I feel like I'm getting larger by the day and my skin is starting to hurt... but at the same time I know I'm only going to get bigger so I might as well enjoy it! LOL I think the photo makes me look a bit smaller than I actually am. We are hopefully going to get some family shots soon so I can have something better than just self portraits!
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