Wondering if anyone has had this happen to them after losing their heart dog..or attachment/fear of abandonment issues...or any advice.
I have not been able to be attached to dogs or form a bond or strong connection after Georgia passed away. I know it sounds horrible. Of course the dogs have been treated all the same, they're still my babies...I just haven't felt that connection. In 2 years. And it is really bothering me. I LOVE DOGS. My whole life has revolved around dogs. If you asked me when I was a kid what I wanted to be when I grew up? A dog. When I ran into my sister's old ex BF from years ago he said Oh my god, Breawna! I thought you'd grow up to be a Golden Retriever and marry a Bassett Hound! LOL. I don't even go in any isle besides the dog isle in book stores. My room is decorated with pictures of me and my dogs. All summer I take my dogs places. When someone asks me what I like or what is significant to me? Pit bulls. What am I going to college for? Anything to do with animals. But I have just felt disconnected. The only connection I have felt with an animal after losing Georgia was with my rat, Monkey that I lost a few months ago. It has bothered me so much I have talked about it to my counselor. UGH
I feel so sad about this I feel like a part of my life is missing. I have always had extreme attachment and trust issues, fear of loss/abandonment. When my dad went on vacation when I was a kid I would cry and scream for DAYS saying I didn't get enough notice. When he came back I wouldn't talk to him for days. When my uncle died that I met once when I was a baby I cried for weeks and prayed to him and always slept with his blanket. When my Grandpa's dog died, I was upset for WEEKS. It has always been a serious problem for me, and now that I have gotten older, of course I handle it differently - but I do it by refusing to be in relationships, form relationships, find ways to get out of relationships so I don't have to deal with losing them after I get attached. I have panic attacks and extreme anxiety if I become attached to someone. I feel WAY too vulnerable. I just don't do it.
So when I lost my dog, my best friend, I lost it. And now I don't know how to start over.