Diagnose me!

[Picklepaige]

Wow, guys, thanks for the responses. I...really don't know how to feel. I mean, it's great that there might be an explanation to the problem, but at the same time...it's kind of a hard blow. I thought autism was always diagnosed as a child? Why am I just now finding answers? I'm seriously considering visiting psychiatrist of some sort, just to get some definite answers. I'm intrigued.

Bax, as I read that link you gave me, I feel as if they were describing me to a "t." Some of the things I didn't mention were mentioned on that site, and...wow. Asperger's is looking to be a very real possibility. It explains SO much.

Maxy, see, I'm not shy at all. I KNOW my friends love me and want me to engage in conversations with them, but I'm SO AWKWARD about it, I just shut up, because it's embarrassing for me to hear myself try to sputter out words and sound ridiculous doing it.

Heck, even my posts here are choppy and without much emotion. I see everyone having friends on here, and joking around and having fun, and I just CAN'T DO THAT. As soon as the conversation moves away from dogs, I really don't know what the say, or if I want to say something, how to say it without sounding awkward and obnoxious.

That's what I want. I want to learn how to communicate, but with this potential "diagnosis", is that even possible??

Dreeza and Sael, I am going to look into those readings you recommended. But first, I want to get a definite diagnosis. I was afraid because I didn't want to face the fact that I was beyond help, but I'm already starting to face it, so I might as well plunge headfirst and get some professional opinions.

But wow, I still can't get over how "me" that link you gave is, Bax.

Lack of empathy.
Forced eye contact.
Very jerky and awkward movements.
Poor handwriting.
Very sensitive to loud noises and bright lights.
Anxiety.
Depression.

It's all there.

Wow.

[Saeleofu]

I thought autism was always diagnosed as a child?

Not at all! I was diagnosed just before I turned 21. Part of it is that the criteria have expanded quite a bit. Autism itself is a fairly recent development as far as recognizing what it is goes, and Asperger's is even newer than that. I don't know how old you are, but when I was a kid, nobody really knew about autism other than the most severe cases.


[quote[Why am I just now finding answers?[/QUOTE]

USUALLY as people age, their autism becomes less severe. However, in higher-functioning cases, a lot of times people can function more or less "normally" through school, and it's when they hit adulthood problems start cropping up. Suddenly you're faced with caring for yourself, caring for an apartment/place to live, holding down a job, socializing with a ton of people you never met before, cooking, cleaning, etc. A lot of times it's more than you can handle, and then the stress on top of it all brings it out. My autism wasn't truly disabling until I was living on my own, and it still took a couple years to figure everything out.

In hindsight, it was pretty clear that I was autistic even as a very young child - hyperlexia, echolalia (lots and lots of echolalia! even now...), stimming, extrememly narrow interests, so many things. But people just didn't look for it back then. They assumed that if you could talk, there's no way you could be autistic.

If you pursue a diagnosis, it can be hard to find someone that is able to diagnosed an adult. Even now there is still a HUGE focus on kids, and adults are pretty much ignored. It took me several months to find someone even willing to see an adult. Most places were like "Oh, you're an adult? We don't do that..." so you may have to search for a while. It might even be best to not even mention the word autism or anything.

Anyway, if you need to talk, have questions, or anything, feel free to PM me!

[Baxter'smybaby]

The thing is that there is support out there--people who can help you learn different ways of interacting--if that is what you want, if you have a proper diagnosis. I have worked with many individual's with an Asperger's diagnosis--very engaging people once they are understood, have their sensory needs met, can identify their own needs, who can now educate the rest of us on how they need to learn, etc.
I hope you find some answers for yourself.

[CharlieDog]

I was diagnosed as an adult as well. A lot of things you listed are incredibly familiar frustrations. Feel free to pm me as well.