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  #51  
Old 01-10-2012, 02:02 PM
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I am showering & dressing up & makeup-ing & gunning for a promotion at work & getting a new foster etc etc etc ad nauseum. Why do I feel so effing empty?!? Lol
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The Plotts:
UKC GRCH 'PR' Hannas Creek Liz
CCH 'PR' Jebb's Bayou Rage CA

And the "off-colored" hounds:
Daisy Duke Garrett CGC, RA & my <3 dog (basset)

Very Missed:
UKC GRCH CCH 'PR' Skyplott Teddy Bearhug
UKC CH CCH 'PR' Hannas Creek Irresistible You
'PR' Dead River K-N-A Swagger - the BAD puppy!
(and Autumn, the feist.)
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  #52  
Old 01-10-2012, 02:08 PM
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You will. Maybe for a long time. Just focus on what you have in your life instead of what you dont. People told me time healed everything and I didn't believe it. At. All. But now I do. I'm happier than I've ever been.
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Chloe - 8 y/o Dachshund/Chihuahua | Violet - 2 y/o Siberian Husky
Rest in peace - Holly (Siberian Husky)|Misty (Siberian Husky)|Princess (Silky Terrier)
Forever in my heart - Dixie (Yorkshire Terrier)|Lucy (Silky Terrier/Yorkie Mix)
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  #53  
Old 01-10-2012, 06:18 PM
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Thanks for the encouragement/"this too shall pass" - it's been immensely helpful. My mom's in the "get over it it's been a month" camp, but it still hurts... it was kinda my life going up in smoke. But yea, I'll shut up now. Lol
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Katie

The Plotts:
UKC GRCH 'PR' Hannas Creek Liz
CCH 'PR' Jebb's Bayou Rage CA

And the "off-colored" hounds:
Daisy Duke Garrett CGC, RA & my <3 dog (basset)

Very Missed:
UKC GRCH CCH 'PR' Skyplott Teddy Bearhug
UKC CH CCH 'PR' Hannas Creek Irresistible You
'PR' Dead River K-N-A Swagger - the BAD puppy!
(and Autumn, the feist.)
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  #54  
Old 01-10-2012, 06:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beanie View Post
If I were anywhere near you, I would smack you across the face and tell you to STOP IT.
Seriously.
Stop it.

Quit talking to him. I don't care what your excuse is - your thoughts are destructive and you need to stop it. You know it's bad, so stop it.
This.
I was with my ex (though it was a she, not a he, but still feelings where there), anyways, we were together for almost 2.5 years. It KILLED me when I found she cheated on me.
But guess what? It took me shorter than expected to get over her, and a lot of it had to do with the people here, Chazzers. They helped me through it, listened to my sobbing, held my hand, and talked some sense into me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sparks19 View Post
put an elastic on your wrist... everytime you think about calling or texting him SNAP IT. lol seriously. Make sure it stings.
THIS, also.
I have used this technique a few times in my life, trust me, it works lol
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  #55  
Old 01-10-2012, 06:47 PM
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As long as you talk to him it's dragging it out. You have to cut contact or it's keeping it fresh, it's not been a month to you.

If you feel a need to talk to him write and write. Fill notebooks. But give yourself you time now. ((hugs))
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  #56  
Old 01-10-2012, 06:58 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by joce View Post

If you feel a need to talk to him write and write. Fill notebooks. But give yourself you time now. ((hugs))
Thank you! I've heard that and I think I'll start. Writing seems to help, a lot. We make the kids do it a lot... it's very therapeutic.
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Katie

The Plotts:
UKC GRCH 'PR' Hannas Creek Liz
CCH 'PR' Jebb's Bayou Rage CA

And the "off-colored" hounds:
Daisy Duke Garrett CGC, RA & my <3 dog (basset)

Very Missed:
UKC GRCH CCH 'PR' Skyplott Teddy Bearhug
UKC CH CCH 'PR' Hannas Creek Irresistible You
'PR' Dead River K-N-A Swagger - the BAD puppy!
(and Autumn, the feist.)
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  #57  
Old 01-10-2012, 07:31 PM
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Renee750il Renee750il is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PlottMom View Post
I don't want to be smacked. I want to lie here until I die.

And Renee, he's 36. Or, he will be, in February, when I'll be 27. So he's not REALLY old. *sigh*

I know my thoughts are destructive I just don't know how to STOP THEM.
That ten year thing. At some point, with that difference, a lot of men start with the "when I'm X and OLD she's still going to be X and YOUNG and she'll want to be with someone who isn't old and in the way."

Stupid, but that's part of it all too often, and there's not a damnthing you can do to change it. It's in THEIR head and nothing and no one else can change it -- only them, and they rarely do.

((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))

And you keep talking it out, and writing it out really does help. Lots.
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Stupid is the most notoriously incurable and contagious disease known to mankind. If you find yourself in close proximity to someone infected with stupid, walk away as soon as said infection is noted.


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  #58  
Old 01-10-2012, 10:57 PM
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Writing is a great idea. When I was going through a difficult breakup, I wrote him a nasty multi-page letter about how much he hurt me and why I'd be better off without him. I didn't send it obviously, but it felt so good to get those thoughts out so I didn't have to continue dwelling on them. Seeing those thoughts on paper made them seem more real and valid in a strange way.

And like everyone said...don't talk to him. You need time away from him to heal. And don't sleep with him, it will only hurt you more.

Just keep getting through it. Keep getting dressed, going out, doing other activities even if they seem difficult. As impossible as it seems, it will get better over time and you'll get through it!
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  #59  
Old 01-11-2012, 12:16 AM
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I also echo the writing thing. You should see all the drafts I have of letters to various people over the years that never got sent, but boy did it feel good to get it out.
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  #60  
Old 01-11-2012, 05:37 AM
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Same here.I actually have a list a mile long over the last 18 months of why I hate my ex. Dumb things he says and how idiotic he is. Used to write in it multiple times a day. Last entry was months ago because I just don't think of him that much.

SUCCESS

/hugs

You will get through this. One step at a time.
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