If you wake me up, not once, not twice, but THREE times in the middle of the night to go potty, could you have the common decency to GO POTTY?!?!? No, of course not, why go potty when you can try to track all the bunnies, squirrels and other assorted wildlife that even THOUGHT about walking through the yard.
Dear dog, I believe you owe me Red Bull or at the very least coffee in the morning, which by the way, is almost here. I would work on growing those opposable thumbs. I WILL allow you to counter surf if it involves you making me a caffinated beverage, just don't take anything that you really shouldn't.