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Old 12-09-2012, 06:57 PM
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Default Conjugal visits?

I've been watching prison wives all evening.. a fascinating waste of time lol
and I noticed some states allow certain things (like conjugal visits) and some don't.
What do you think about the issue?

Do prisoners have the right to a little something something with their wives?

I'm on the fence. On one hand.. I'm like..they are prisoners. They are serving time not on vacation..they've most likely done something awful. And especially with those charged with murder.. the people they killed certainly aren't getting any
but on the other.. I kind of feel for their wives and I do believe prisons have mentioned that it lowers prisoner violence and fights..which I suppose is a good thing.
and all prisons allow marriages. So it's like..well..
Regardless It's weird that states have different rules on the issue. Like where you committed a crime somehow makes your stay in prison more/less bad.


Thoughts?
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Old 12-09-2012, 07:03 PM
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Oooh. Well I guess it would depend on what they're in prison for. Also if they are 'good' prisoners. How long are they going to be there? I think this is more like "Why are the wives/girlfriends still with these guys?". I think prison could use an over-haul, anyway. We (America) tends to suck at re-introducing people who have served time into the world. I'm like you, Fran. On one hand I am emphatic and feel bad and on the other.... you screwed up. You know the consequences. You shouldn't have done what you did.

Personally I couldn't imagine myself doing something like that. I mean, everyone knows why you're there. That's a bit too public for me. But I also couldn't imagine myself being in a relationship with a prisoner. My love has limits.
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Old 12-09-2012, 07:10 PM
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Oooh. Well I guess it would depend on what they're in prison for. Also if they are 'good' prisoners. How long are they going to be there? I think this is more like "Why are the wives/girlfriends still with these guys?". I think prison could use an over-haul, anyway. We (America) tends to suck at re-introducing people who have served time into the world. I'm like you, Fran. On one hand I am emphatic and feel bad and on the other.... you screwed up. You know the consequences. You shouldn't have done what you did.

Personally I couldn't imagine myself doing something like that. I mean, everyone knows why you're there. That's a bit too public for me. But I also couldn't imagine myself being in a relationship with a prisoner. My love has limits.
Oh yea no way in hell Lol Me? HA! No way, no how.

but from what I've noticed... most of these women meet these men with prison writing programs/marry in prison.
Which is already kind of 0.o to me.. but I feel like, if we are allowing them to have pen pals and get married... private visits doesn't seem that far fetched.

The weirdest thing to me is that some of these women seem to really be in love you know? Maybe I'm just too much of a push over but I really find myself feeling bad for them... a relationship made of 30 minute phone calls and letters and visits through a plexiglass window once a month..
but then I'm back to.. BUT HE'S A MURDERER!

and then I just hate the part of me that wants bad people to suffer like it somehow makes what they did..better?
They are in prison. Serving time..safe away from society. That should be enough. It's not a good part of human nature to want to make the guilty suffer.

Complicated.
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Old 12-10-2012, 04:17 AM
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A lot of people behind bars are not violent people. Many of them have made stupid decisions. Staying together would be very hard if the significant other is imprisoned. It would not be unusual for couples to drift away from each other and finally break the relationship off. Interestingly, a lot of couples would stay together despite the hardship. Is it true love? Love and commitment? Whatever the reason they would look forward to the telephone sessions and to conjugal visits. Conjugal visit is a privilege given to an inmate for good behavior. If this kind of "reward" would somehow ease the loneliness of the couple and would prevent prison violence then why not?
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Old 12-09-2012, 07:07 PM
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For good behavior...I'm completely fine with it.
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Old 12-09-2012, 07:11 PM
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For good behavior...I'm completely fine with it.
Yup and I bet it inspires good behavior.
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Old 12-09-2012, 07:53 PM
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They are usually women with issues and its sad to watch They look for a man that is unavailable and usually if he gets out it doesn't last long.

No, your in jail, why should you get to have sex. You are there to be punished and part of that is that you are not alone with your so. Sorry. You screwed up. If your other half waits around great for you, but it gives you both time to think I guess.

Not breaking the law so you don't go to jail is supposed to make you have good behavior.
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Old 12-09-2012, 09:00 PM
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No, your in jail, why should you get to have sex. You are there to be punished and part of that is that you are not alone with your so. Sorry. You screwed up. If your other half waits around great for you, but it gives you both time to think I guess.

Not breaking the law so you don't go to jail is supposed to make you have good behavior.
But isn't the goal (or shouldn't the goal) of jail to make it so people don't commit more crimes?

If so shouldn't fixing people be the plan. Punishing them and making them harder and less likely to reintegrate is only going to push them to more crime..
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Old 12-09-2012, 09:12 PM
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Then educate them. Many reoffend. I do t think the visits stop it. It's been shown many many programs and follow ups don't stop them from reoffending.

I'd think knowing they can keep seeing the wife on the inside alone is like "why not".
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Old 12-09-2012, 08:03 PM
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Quote:
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For good behavior...I'm completely fine with it.
Me too, perhaps if prisons offered "conjugal visits" as payment for good behavior then maybe they would get less "prisoners behaving badly"
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